Mr. Creepy Rates Hollywood's Latest Cheese!
Sunday, March 18, 2007
  Rental: Stranger Than Fiction
8. This was one of those many movies that slipped past me in the theaters over the holiday season. It's ok... the ginormous screen at the faithful AMC googleplex wouldn't have added anything to it. This is a great movie... one of those films that will be called a "modern American classic" when TNT runs it 17 times over a weekend 10 years from now. Will Farrell plays his role completely straight, for which I'll thank him sincerely next time I see him before punching him in the head for the rest of his comedy tripe. Emma Thompson is so neurotic, she's almost painful to watch. And I'm now baffled that Dustin Hoffman wasn't nominated for a best supporting actor award for his role.

I don't think I'll spoil any surprises by mentioning the plot. Will's character is a somewhat obsessive/compulsive IRS auditor who leads a completely boring life. Then one day he begins to hear the voice of a female author narrating his life as if it were a novel. Will suspects he's cracking up and would probably just go through the rest of his life merely annoyed with the voice until it explains that he's going to die. Here begins his quest to figure out what's going on and why he's fated to die (something not even Emma has worked out yet) and to "live" a little in case his number is coming up. And finally he finds out if it is.

See this at your earliest opportunity.
  1:04 AM
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What's this all about?

This blog is basically for me... so I can remember what the hell I watched over the years. If it saves you some time and money, so much the better. But rather than use some lame-ass rating system where even a "5" can designate a really stank movie, I've chosen to use the brilliant Creepy Scale at which "1" is the point at which the film is even remotely worth seeing. Anything lower than that a 1, and your time would be better spent in a coma or stabbing yourself repeatedly in the thigh with a fork. Allow me to explain:

The Creepy Scale© of movie rating:

  0   For the love of god, no! It's two whole hours of your life that you'll be begging to have back! Not only is this not worth seeing, it may well be worth not seeing.
  1   If, while flipping through network TV channels in some dive motel, your choices are this or the Weather Channel... choose this. The parts they edit out for network broadcast won't make a bit of difference.
  2   Let's be realistic. Of course you're going to go out and see that annoying old college room mate over a few beers. But set the VCR for this as you're headed out the door. Some night at 3:00 am when the insomnia's kicked in and you're thinking about calling him again, pop this in instead. You won't feel like you wasted your night this time.
  3   Rent it if Blockbuster is out of new releases or you need to rent a movie that can be made substancially more fun by watching with a bunch of friends. It'll be better than Ishtar, I gaurentee.
  4  Movies like this make it worth subscribing to the premium movie channel of your choice just so you can avoid the year long wait that it takes to reach regular TV.
  5   It'll be great on your balls-nasty home theater system. And you'll feel all financially smug knowing you waited for it.
  6   Got a free movie pass? Now's the time, baby! The only thing seperating this from a good rental is that there's something about it that you should see on a whopping big theater screen or surrounded by the unwashed masses with bathtubs full of greasy overpriced popcorn.
  7  The Scenario: You have 2 hours worth of afternoon to waste and you're out of clean underwear. You can either go see this flick or do some laundry. Settle into those skid marks for one more day and get out there.
  8   Go ahead, take the afternoon off for a nice matinee. You'll feel like a wealthy man knowing you saw this film and only paid 5 bucks to do it.
  9   The traffic, the crowd, the wallet sucking full price admission, and the 6 dollar Twislers..... By the time you leave the theater after seeing this, they'll have all been worth it.
  10  No matter how many times you see it, this one's entertaining every single time. You won't mind paying full price for it again and again, and you'll probably want to own it as soon at it's out on DVD.